Lately I’ve had several people comment on my faith, how spiritual connected I am or am not. Needless to say, it’s getting under my skin. I’m starting to feel this anger within myself that I haven’t had before. A person’s faith is such an intimate aspect of themselves that I find it strange that other feels it’s suitable to comment on. Within a span of two weeks, I had two individuals call me a doubting Thomas and another tell me I was spiritually sound. It floored me. I thought judgment on another’s faith was unchristian-like to begin with.
I immediately felt the need to defend myself, and my relationship with my God. But of course….I just smiled and acted shocked. I believe my response was, “Wow…most people say I have a wonderful relationship,” and smiled through it. Part of me wishes I spoke up, that I had defended myself and my faith; yet another part of me feels that saying nothing is just right. My relationship with the Lord is my relationship, and there shouldn’t be a need to defend it. It shouldn’t be open for debate. Then I began thinking to myself what is it that makes other think I don’t have enough faith….and I keep thinking about it.
I believe in God fully. He’s there, and he guides me. I believe that his son walked this Earth. What I continually struggle with isn’t that they exist, but the love everyone says they have for me. I question my validity as someone worthy of saving. Do I give back? Do I help those in need? Most importantly, do I do it for the right reasons? I have a hard time grasping the concept that I don’t need to do anything to be deserving of sacrifice and love. It’s not something I’m familiar with. So when I do offer rides to the old man down the street, or give my food to a homeless woman, I wonder if I have some subconscious desire to do so to please…and not to just help out of my heart.
But why exactly is that open to comment? Why do my feelings about myself and my worthiness up for debate and commentary? That I will never understand. I’m not sure why these people were so open about making statements about it. Am I just being too sensitive?
I’m still holding myself to the constraints I was taught as a child. I was raised Catholic and many ways consider myself Catholic. As an adult I drifted away from Catholicism, and more towards non-denominationalism. Is that a word? If not, let’s make it a word. Some of the “rules” the Church required obedience towards started to not make sense to me. They still don’t, but I continue to question myself when I break them. Not going to confession but accepting communion, I struggle with. Even though my current church has no rules about this, I wonder if I’m doing something dishonest. Am I being judged?
Apparently I am but by my peers. What upsets me the most is that I thought I was able to come off as not having these doubts in myself. I do my best to keep my questions, personal scoreboard and personal rules to myself. Yet, somehow I still come off as a doubter.
I don’t think I’ve ever heard the phrase ‘Doubting Thomas’ before! Lol
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It comes from Christ’s follower who doubted so deeply that Jesus had returned that he put his hands on the wounds to confirm it was Jesus. 🙂
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I try never to discuss anything to do with faith to anyone. My beliefs are mine and mine alone.
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Oh my, I haven’t heard a doubting Thomas since my school years. I think it is important to remember to be a good person always. Great post!
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I think you can only see good in others, only when you are good yourself. so, totally with you.
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Well said I am not religious but I respect peoples faiths and would never presume to comment on their beliefs x
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My faith is my personal stuff that I don’t feel comfortable sharing with others but I do respect others faiths and beliefs!
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It really is amazing how people will try to but into others business! I know I personally try to avoid religion and politic talks with friends, makes it easier.
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I don’t suppose anyone can accurately comment on anyone else’s faith as it’s really quite a personal thing. Nobody knows your faith like you and God.
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It always amazes me how free people feel to comment on things that they really have no place commenting on. That said, I do feel that questioning and even doubt are okay, and also have their place.
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People comment on SO much that is not their own to do so. I feel like I want to hide, and just not discuss those things anymore, but that isn’t the point. The point is not to hide, but to embrace the differences in others. ❤
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Faith and religion are both sensitive topics which I don’t like discussing with anyone, even my friends. I like to make sure that I live within my faith but I also would rather not cross people, out of respect. I just wish they thought the same.
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I am sorry to hear that someone judged you and your faith. I am with you and don’t think that someone should do that. I personally don’t think that I have a good relationship with God and I keep working on it on a daily basis. Nonetheless I think it would truly discourage me if someone would comment on it. Thank you for sharing your feelings and for make me realize that I should not be judged by others.
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I have been in your place before and I openly ask the person judging me to stop because my faith is my personal issue with God..it can be challenging because you don’t want to come of rude or confrontational/angry, but it does make me angry. I loved your post and your perspective on judgement.
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cast the first stone if you are not guilty… i use this for people who judge my faith, why will anyone doubt my faith? my faith is for and with me and my God alone, and no one has the right to question it in anyway except they can cast the very first stone on theirs…
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I usually try to keep my beliefs to myself to avoid conflicts. It’s just easier that way.
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This is a very interesting topic. As much as possible, we shouldn’t talk about our faith to people who doesn’t understand about it.
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I would reply, “Judge not lest ye be judged.”
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Nobody truly knows your heart like God does. But I am all about sharing the Gospel and letting others know that I have a relationship with Him.
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I agree, a person’s faith is a personal matter. Who are we to judge anyway? IMHO someone’s faith shouldn’t be anyone else’s business, unless they’re caring for children or working in public ministry.
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Beliefs, Religion and Faith are all a personal journey that no one can share (except maybe your significant other) so no one has the right to comment or judge. It isn’t a very Christian thing to do…however I see more and more people pointing fingers at each other…. Hopefully we can all start remembering that if we don’t want people to judge us then we should stop judging us….. (not that you judged the others,,, thinking in reverse if those people dont want others to judge them they shouldn’t judge you.)
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Faith is personal matter for me and we shouldn’t judge suddenly by a beliefs and religion.
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Wow, that’s really rude, and honestly, not very tactful to ask someone, let alone CRITICIZE someone over their faith? Tell those people to mind their own business and keep their concerns focused on their own faithfulness
-Clarissa @ The View From Here
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I completely agree with a new denomination of “nondemonimationalism”. lol Faith is such a personal aspect. There really is no room for speculation or judgement in my book.
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I don’t think you can argue with people’s faith. It can never be a fact based argument, only a values-based one. Thanks for sharing.
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Interesting topic! What I found out about with regards to faith is that when people do talk about it, other people feel that they have to put their own two cents about what you’ve just said then it all becomes this giant blob of mess that gets nowhere. In my opinion, every one is entitled to their own way of thinking about faith and other matters in general. No reason to be rude about it just because the other people don’t happen to agree with what you’re saying…to each our own or something like that! Don’t mind the rude people!
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Some people think they have the right to give comments about our beliefs and when you do the same thing they will get offended. I have learned to stop myself from dealing or arguing with these people and just keep quiet. There’s really no use arguing with them.
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I totally agree. Faith is like a emotions, it’s very personal and though we don’t understand other faith but we have no right to comment or disrespect them.
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Usually other people don’t understand one’s personal connection with the Most High. Don’t worry yourself with their opinions, as long as you’re happy and sticking to your own path 🙂
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I don’t think it’s anyone’s business what your relationship with God is. It’s a personal relationship and people shouldn’t be judging or questioning you about it.
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Faith is your own intimate thing – and there’s no right or wrong. If you believe in God, others shoud respect that. If someone doesn’t believe, others should respect that as well. Just keep doing you 🙂
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Every individual has the right to follow whichever faith they want to and no one should be bothered or should degrade them.
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Thank you for writing a post that shows your vulnerability! It’s sad that people pay more attention to others and not themselves! You never doubt yourself and continue to shine! I love the phrase “Throw kindness around like confetti.”
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Faith is what grounds me. I love my faith and very passionate about serving the almighty Lord.
Please continue walking your path of life and live according to your walk of faith. Do not be discourage by others 🙂
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I don’t follow any religion, but I also know better than to judge people for their choices.
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There’re things that are private and no need to tell or explain to anyone. It might be connected to the culture we are living how people react to different things, but for me faith is one of those private matters.
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My faith is not exactly mainstream – I am a Pagan, and practicing Hedge Witch, something I don’t usually advertise too much, because I know how people react – violent, in some cases, with an eye-roll for others. Faith is such a private matter, and we would all be better off, if we would allow others to practice their faith like they want to, and learn to co-exist.
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